A Birthday Tradition

Dear Molly,

I owe you an apology. I forgot about this blog, and the tradition I have of writing you a blog post every year. Worse-- I nearly forgot to wish you happy birthday, and I didn't prove myself to be a Best Friend to you today. I realize now as this day comes to a close that I have no excuse for distance, or at least, nothing good enough. It's your birthday and I've been a crappy friend to you today. I apologize. I hope you can forgive me and accept this reminder of what a ridiculous person I can be--

Click here.

I just wanted to let you know that I'm sorry that our friendship is all fail and... absent lately. That I've been absent lately, in physical and emotional presence. You're my best friend and it's almost like I've abandoned you completely. I'm sure you're sitting there nodding as you read this... but yeah.

Anyway, I hope you had a fabulous day. The weather was beautiful and that test didn't kill us and exams are almost over. The school year is winding down and the promise of summer has begun to infiltrate our already-distracted minds. It's time to dress in pretty dresses and make cupcakes and cookies and run in the early morning hours and finish up that bucket list, because we've procrastinated too long.

I hope today, you felt mature or different in some way-- in a good way. That you felt the promise of another year of life and the thrill of the knowledge that you're an adult now. It's terrifying, isn't it? But it's also exciting and wonderful and canyoubelieveit?

I love you, and miss you (that's always such an awkward thing to say but it's true!).

Lylatbgaetc MOST EVER. <3
-Aly

The Problem with Cheese

Wait, what?!

What could POSSIBLY be the problem with cheese? I know you’re confused. I mean, it’s simple… I like cheese, so do you! And so do most people. YAY, CHEESE!

(That was random. Please excuse.)

You know what my problem with cheese is?

THE SMELL.

There, I said it. I mean, I loveeee cheese, and rather unconditionally, too. Heck, I just ate an 1/8 of a wheel of Camembert (god, the French and their 325 varieties of cheese, though if they ask, it’s exactly 365 kinds of French cheese, “one for every day of the year!”… This is a lie.)… without bread. And it was pretty good. But then, I BREATHED.

SOUND THE ALARMS, you guys! LISTERINE NEEDED! And tic-tacs! In fact, ANYTHING BREATH-FRESHENING! You have a load of after-dinner mints? I’ll take the lot.

I always wonder… is the quality of cheese measured on the scent (the better the cheese, the worse the scent!), or should it be the other way around? The worse the scent, the worse the cheese…

The point is… cheese.

I’m going to go eat some of that French chocolate (actually, it’s not French, I think it’s Swiss… Lindt!) now. And then accidentally drown myself in toothpaste.

WHOO.

-Aly

P.S. Yeah, this was weird. You're welcome.

Nothing that Important, No, Not Really at all

Hello!

It's MAY fourth! Which means tomorrow is Cinco de Mayo, which I've NEVER celebrated!
Oh, wait, tomorrow's the fifth of May.

WHICH IS MOLLY'S BIRTHDAY!

And, dangit, I'm in freaking France.

Molly, I have lots of things planned to make up for this. You'll see them all tomorrow, or at later dates. I wish you a deeeeelicious breakfast, a cookie cake, good wake-up music (oh, hello there, 80s!), many pictures with friends, and one of those kinda lame but kinda cute plastic princess crowns to wear at school all day. Because you're awesome, and it's you FREAKING BIRTHDAY tomorrow!

To anybody else reading this... MAKE SURE TO WISH MOLLY HAPPY BIRTHDAY IN OBNOXIOUS WAYS! WITH EXCLAMATION POINTS AND MUSIC AND STUFF.

Happy (early) 17th, Molly!
-Aly

P.S. Good luck on any exams you may have on your birthday... that's just an extra excuse to eat more (*tempted to say chicken*. NO, I meant...) CAKE! ;D (of the cookie variety, yummm.)

Growing Up

Hello!

Aly here, for the first time in a while. Missed me? (I hear that a lot these days, y'know.) It felt like a good time to write on this blog, so here I am.

I talked to Molly this morning before going to school (via Skype), and it was just awesome, despite the fact that she really should have been sleeping and I should have been eating breakfast. She already knows I miss her bunches, but conversations like that make me so glad I'm gone, and don't worry, I'll explain that statement (it's not because I'm missing drama).

The thing about being a foreign place for a long period of time, without your "security blanket", is that is forces you to re-define yourself. When you don't know anybody, not really, you have to figure out who you are all over again and show that to new people. I thought I had myself figured out, or as figured out as any teenager can... but yet, this experience has proven me wrong. The great thing about me being gone is that it's the same for Molly at home, just in a different way. Same surroundings, same people, same self, just the definition of self that comes once you're detached from your "twin", somebody that knows you just as well (if not better) than you know yourself.

I'd already done the religion thing, figuring out what I believe more precisely, and I'm very comfortable with what I believe now-- there's no questioning or uncertainty on my part. For Molly, this hasn't been the case. It's not my place to say, but the reason for her recent very religious posts are that she has finally figured it out for herself. Without me influencing, because that's one thing were we're opposite. The thing is, she's figured out so much more than that while I've been gone, and that conversation this morning showed me that. I've changed, too, but we're still twins and best friends, and I am really happy for her, that she's had the same opportunity to grow, even if the religion thing freaked me out at first.

The truth of the matter is that we're growing up, both of us. Separately and at the same time, but we're growing up in such a way that we'd both have to slap you if you said "growing apart". Oceans can separate us in distance, but at the same time, that's impossible.

It's been four months here (as of tomorrow), but I'm already so different from when I left. I'm different in ways that I LIKE. I feel older, in a good way-- more mature, more understanding. I feel less like a kid mentally; this experience has given me insights into myself and other people, and even my mother. I'm still learning and growing, but without coming here, I don't think it would be the same.

I've just come back from vacation. I'm kind of out of it. That vacation was amazing, and I spent a LOT of time thinking and reflecting, writing and contemplating my time here. What have I accomplished? Many things, but not enough of what I wanted. I'm anxious to start traveling again, to learn more and discover. To continue to prove to myself that I AM capable of all the things I doubt I can do. When I go home, I will be able to say this was the experience of a lifetime, because including the bad things, the timing wasn't wrong. No matter what N says, that I'm too young for this... I know-- for myself-- that the timing was perfect.

My time here will nearly be over in 2 months. The end of a dream, I would have said. In a way, it is. Can it be the end of a dream if I realized a dream I didn't know I had and lived another experience? If it exceeded expectations or disappointed, was it the same dream? I'm not the same person, not exactly... but yes, this is my dream; it's my reality, too.

♥
-Aly

P.S. Molly, talk to you soon!

Lent

Lent: n.The 40 weekdays from Ash Wednesday until Easter observed by Christians as a season of fasting and penitence in preparation for Easter.
simple, right?

"We have 40 days to prepare ourselves, to face ourselves, and to examine ourselves in the presence of God."
"It means dying to an old way of being...However you feel called to observe or participate in or whatever it is you give up during this Lenten season do so with the intentionality of drawing closer to God"

So basically the point is to be like whoa. I screw up more than I thought, and I can't do anything without God. The point is that when it gets difficult to not have whatever you gave up or keep up with whatever you said you'd do, you lean on God to help you stay away from/in...whatever it is.
The season of Lent is taken for granted. I feel like a lot of people today make a game out of it rather than taking it to heart and realizing how much more important it is than they think.
The main idea here is commitment. The object here is not to see who can last the longest without breaking their commitment, or how many other people you can get to break theirs. Lent is a time to be motivated to recommit to God by realizing how much we screw up through our commitment to giving something up or making a habit of something. It's not meant to be a competition. In fact, it's not even meant to be between ourselves and other people, but between us and God because when we tell other people, "Hey I'm giving (insert...something here) for Lent" we sound like we're putting ourselves above everyone else. Not only that, but more importantly, people are going to want to tempt us, not necessarily because they're mean people, but because they're human.
I'm in no position to say any of this because I'm guilty of all of it. It just bothers me. It also bothers me that when people mention Lent, they only talk about themselves and what they're giving up or adding. Nobody goes deeper into the topic anymore, and the reality of it just sits there. The reality is that we mess up a LOT, and we can't fix any of that without God. The reality is that the next 40 days are a window of oppurtunity to be critical of ourselves, recommit, and prepare ourselves for the death and resurrection of Christ. The reality is that we are completely helpless without Him, and it's time we start taking that, along with the Lenten promises we make seriously. (myself included)

Here's to You

Here's to those guys.

Here's to the guys who put up with hours of complaining about what jerks guys are while disproving the whole point by simply listening.
Here's to the guys who hold you close when you're hurting and will call the person who hurt you just about anything, even if that person is his friend.
Here's to the guys who you can tell anything and genuinely trust them to keep it to themselves.
Here's to the guys who offer to kick another guy in the nuts for you.
Here's to the guys who listen to you talk for half an hour about how much you love what's-his-face's eyes.
Here's to the guys who don't retaliate when you throw random little things at them.
Here's to the guys who DO retaliate when you smack them with a pillow.
Here's to the guys who tell you what you want to hear, and not just because they know it's what you want to hear.
Here's to the guys who sing "Don't Worry be Happy" to you when you're freaking out over something.
Here's to the guys who sit in Starbucks with you for an hour laughing about fart stories.
Here's to the guys who know when to try to help and when to just say "that sucks" when you're in a sticky situation.
Here's to the guys who run around for 20 minutes creeping up on you during your cross country race.
Here's to the guys who are willing to risk their masculinity just to make you smile.
Here's to the guys who actually pick up their phones.
Here's to the guys who will talk to you for three hours about nothing.
Here's to the guys who listen to you talk about how awesome they are, and why you absolutely can't date them.
Here's to the guys who pretend like you make sense.
Here's to the guys who put up with the music in your car...and your driving.
Here's to the guys who make you laugh when you call them after a disasterous hookup.
Here's to the guys who will leave the flour they just spilled on their pants so you can take a picture for facebook.
Here's to the guys who sit in a car for 45 minutes with your parents so they can come watch you race.
Here's to the guys who dance around like idiots with you.
Here's to the guys who put up with any and all of your girly complaints.
Here's to the guys who help you decipher two sentences you heard that attractive guy in your class say earlier.
Here's to the guys who go to your concert just because you want them to hear one particular song.
Here's to the guys who show up at that concert in combat boots.
Here's to the guys who convince you to try out for the solo, the role, the team, etc.
Here's to the guys who lift your spirits when you don't make it.
Here's to the nice guys; the ones who love you for who you are.

Disappearing Acts

Hello, Molly.

I was working on writing you a fantastically amazing letter, but, like the amazing postcard to Amdi, it was EATEN (by this room). So, I'll be starting on Draft Two (or rather, Draft 1.2) of that likenow. But I just wanted to pop in and say hello. When're you planning on sending that box? Because I definitely have some things we need to discuss about that ;)

UHMYEAH. I don't really have much to say (as I shall be writing you a letter), but I hope you have been having an awesome snow day... and again tomorrow! xD

Best wishes,
your disappearing twin,
-Aly