Here's to You

Here's to those guys.

Here's to the guys who put up with hours of complaining about what jerks guys are while disproving the whole point by simply listening.
Here's to the guys who hold you close when you're hurting and will call the person who hurt you just about anything, even if that person is his friend.
Here's to the guys who you can tell anything and genuinely trust them to keep it to themselves.
Here's to the guys who offer to kick another guy in the nuts for you.
Here's to the guys who listen to you talk for half an hour about how much you love what's-his-face's eyes.
Here's to the guys who don't retaliate when you throw random little things at them.
Here's to the guys who DO retaliate when you smack them with a pillow.
Here's to the guys who tell you what you want to hear, and not just because they know it's what you want to hear.
Here's to the guys who sing "Don't Worry be Happy" to you when you're freaking out over something.
Here's to the guys who sit in Starbucks with you for an hour laughing about fart stories.
Here's to the guys who know when to try to help and when to just say "that sucks" when you're in a sticky situation.
Here's to the guys who run around for 20 minutes creeping up on you during your cross country race.
Here's to the guys who are willing to risk their masculinity just to make you smile.
Here's to the guys who actually pick up their phones.
Here's to the guys who will talk to you for three hours about nothing.
Here's to the guys who listen to you talk about how awesome they are, and why you absolutely can't date them.
Here's to the guys who pretend like you make sense.
Here's to the guys who put up with the music in your car...and your driving.
Here's to the guys who make you laugh when you call them after a disasterous hookup.
Here's to the guys who will leave the flour they just spilled on their pants so you can take a picture for facebook.
Here's to the guys who sit in a car for 45 minutes with your parents so they can come watch you race.
Here's to the guys who dance around like idiots with you.
Here's to the guys who put up with any and all of your girly complaints.
Here's to the guys who help you decipher two sentences you heard that attractive guy in your class say earlier.
Here's to the guys who go to your concert just because you want them to hear one particular song.
Here's to the guys who show up at that concert in combat boots.
Here's to the guys who convince you to try out for the solo, the role, the team, etc.
Here's to the guys who lift your spirits when you don't make it.
Here's to the nice guys; the ones who love you for who you are.

Dear Dumbo; I Kinda Hate Your Guts.

Hiya.

I would normally EXCLAIM HAPPINESS at people. But I have been teetering on the edge of insanity for three days.
But he (yes; Dumbo) is:
Driving me crazy. Killing me with my own impatience. I am Unable to function.

[Rant to nobody in particular/Dumbo]

You KNOW this. I have TOLD YOU that you are like HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE or something--- you keep giving me heart attacks. Have you seen 'em? Y'know, when I completely freak out, scream, and DIVE INTO CORNERS? Where I'm torn between wishing that you'll see me and praying that you are oblivious. Where I hope that you'll come up to me and give me a hug and stop tormenting me.

"You have placed me in quite an annoying situation," you say (over a text because I can't speak to you in person now, dammit). ANNOYING SITUATION?! ANNOYING SITUATION?! I WILL GIVE YOU AN "ANNOYING SITUATION"!
An ANNOYING FRICKING SITUATION is me diving into corners to avoid you. An "ANNOYING SITUATION" is you taking days to make up your mind. An ANNOYING SITUATION is my mother expending a lot of effort to convince me that your lack of response means that no matter what, it's a no and she's seen this coming for years and quite frankly, I'm starting to believe her.

An annoying situation is one of my best friends telling me that "drama" is her continual wish to talk to her boyfriend, when CLEARLY I'm having a CRISIS. Another annoying situation is that I am so FRUSTRATED with you right now that I honestly kinda hate you. An annoying situation is my inability to eat, to sleep, and your constant presence in my mind.

Most annoyingly is the fact that you aren't giving me an answer and you can just move away and never look back at the girl that is dying over YOU. That, my friend, is ANNOYING.

Grow some and give me a fricking answer. This is ridiculous.
-Aly